Divorcing on the grounds of “irreconcilable differences” is the avenue taken by many couples looking to divorce in Illinois. By claiming that “irreconcilable differences” exist, the couple is essentially telling the court that differences have developed between the two of them that make it impossible or, at the very least, impracticable for the marriage to continue. Divorcing on the grounds of irreconcilable differences in Illinois carries with it an accompanying requirement: the parties must show that they have been living “separately and apart” for at least six months before the divorce case can proceed. (If one spouse does not agree that “irreconcilable differences” exist, then the other spouse must show that the couple has been living “separately and apart” for two years.)

If the two spouses agree that irreconcilable differences exist and if they can agree on the date they began living “separately and apart,” then in most cases the court will accept the parties’ stipulation and will not conduct any further investigation into the matter. But if there is a disagreement between the spouses, one spouse will need to provide evidence establishing when the couple began living “separately and apart.”

Living Separate and Apart Does Not Require Separate Residences

Recently the hackers responsible for leaking millions of users’ information from the Ashley Madison website posted a second batch of information containing an even greater number of user profile information. Many feared a sharp and abrupt spike in the number of divorces filed across the country as spouses became aware of their partner’s cheating and/or infidelity. Although it is far too early to tell if such “doom and gloom” predictions hold true, one reality television star previously in the spotlight for family-related issues has already admitted that he has been unfaithful to his wife by maintaining two accounts on the Ashley Madison website.

Is Adultery an Outdated Concept?

It seems as if our culture is not surprised anymore when allegations of adultery are either admitted to or proven true, at least in cases of celebrities and politicians. (Adultery, of course, can be said to occur whenever a married individual engages in sexual relations with a person other than his or her spouse.) One sign that our culture no longer views adultery in the same manner as it once did is the proliferation of “no-fault” divorce laws. In states that have adopted “no-fault” laws, a couple can obtain a divorce without any showing that one spouse engaged in any “bad behavior” like adultery: instead, the parties can obtain a divorce simply on a stipulation or finding that the spouses have irreconcilable differences.

Divorce is not the only way to end a marriage. In certain limited circumstances, a marriage can be dissolved through an annulment. An annulment is a powerful judicial decree since it declares that no valid marriage ever existed. While an annulment does not generally affect the rights of any children born to the couple prior to the annulment, having a marriage declared invalid through annulment can affect any division of any property the couple acquired during the “marriage” and generally will prevent one party from receiving spousal support from the other.

The Difference between Void and Voidable Marriages

There are two types of marriages that can be annulled: void and voidable. A void marriage is one that is illegal from its inception and cannot be rectified. A voidable marriage, however, is one that is invalid at the moment of marriage but that can later be made valid through the consent or inaction of the parties. In other words, if an annulment is not promptly sought, it might not be available later.

When two spouses file for divorce, oftentimes the two are not on very good speaking terms (except in those rare cases where both spouses agree that they are not good marriage partners for one another and wish to amicably divorce). A divorcing couple that refuses to speak to one another – even through their attorneys – faces several challenges throughout the divorce process:

• First, because every issue will need to be litigated in court, the divorce process will take longer;
• Second, because the process will take longer each side will incur more legal fees than they might otherwise; and
• Lastly, because a judge will need to decide important issues in the divorce neither spouse may be completely satisfied with the decision handed down by the court.

Depending on the specific court and judge handling your divorce case, you may be ordered to attend mediation to attempt to resolve issues on which you and your spouse cannot agree. While you do not have to accept a mediated agreement (especially one that is not favorable to you), you do have the obligation to at least participate in the process.

What Should My Ex-Spouse and I Talk about at Mediation?

A recent report touched on the growing nationwide problem of parents who are being reported to local child protection agencies for behaviors and decisions the parents believe are normal, healthy parenting decisions. For example, in one instance an Illinois couple faced an investigation for child abuse after someone saw the couple’s children playing in a park next door to their apartment and reported the couple for child neglect. These types of cases do not just “go away”: years later the couple is continuing to fight back against authorities that found they were guilty of neglecting their children.

Abusing Laws Designed to Protect Others

Domestic violence, child abuse, and child neglect have all received a great deal of attention in recent years. Many states – Illinois included – have enacted tough laws that are designed to encourage concerned individuals to report suspected child abuse or child neglect without fear of repercussion and that make it easy for abused domestic partners to seek restraining orders against their abusive partners. As good and laudable as these efforts are, they can be easily abused and manipulated.