For parents, the prospect of spending a major holiday without their children can be jarring. Most major holidays are considered family affairs. Unfortunately, when two parents are no longer living together, one of them is likely to miss seeing their children on some important holidays. Holiday parenting time should be addressed in the parenting plan you will be legally required to have before your divorce is finalized.

Attorneys and mediators can offer many different creative options for parents who must share their children’s time during the holidays after a divorce. A lot of different factors can go into deciding what type of arrangement is best, such as how far apart the parents live and whether they both practice the same religion. A qualified Wheaton, IL, child custody lawyer can give you some ideas to consider and help negotiate with the other parent on your behalf. 

Creative Holiday Custody Options for Divorced Parents in DuPage County, IL

Spending the holidays a little differently can be a big adjustment. However, most parents and children adapt to their new normal rather quickly. Creative custody options for the holiday season include:

Contested child custody cases can be difficult for parents and children alike. Things like having a guardian ad litem come in and interview your children or having a judge evaluate how involved in your child’s life you are can be immensely stressful. However, some of the difficult processes your family will go through are essential to helping the court make the best decisions. Remember that every decision the judge makes must be based on what is in the best interests of the child in question. While the judge strives to determine what type of parenting time calendar and allocation of parental responsibilities would be best for your child, there are steps you as a parent can take to protect your child’s well-being during the process. It is important to follow your Illinois family law attorney’s advice and keep them advised of your co-parenting strategy during an active custody dispute. 

Preparing Children Without Coaching

A common issue in contested child custody cases is coaching. “Coaching” refers to a parent teaching their child what to say to the judge and guardian ad litem. An unscrupulous parent might train their young children to say ugly things about the other parent or to complain of abuse that never happened. It is normally quite apparent to the trained eye of a GAL when a child is only repeating what they were told to say. 

Preparing your child for these conversations is different. You can talk with your child about the questions they might be asked without suggesting a response. It can also help to explain the roles of your lawyers, the GAL, and the judge so the child feels that they understand what is happening. 

In uncontested divorce, spouses have a lot of freedom in how they divide their marital assets. Collaborative divorce has become far more popular than a contested divorce. It is easy to see why. When you go to court, it is largely up to a judge how they divide your marital assets, so long as they comply with Illinois law. When you and your spouse go to mediation or begin negotiating, you retain much more control over the final outcome. Alternative dispute resolution is also private, whereas contested divorce is not. Finally, deciding how to divide your property together is usually much less expensive and time-consuming than going through a battle in the courtroom. However, it can still be difficult for spouses to work together to come up with a fair way to divide their marital property. There are a number of strategies spouses can use during collaborative divorce. Even in out-of-court divorce, you should be represented by a family law attorney who can advocate for you during the process. 

3 Ways to Approach Asset Division

Illinois law states that marital property should be divided in a way that is fair to both spouses. This is the goal in mediation as well. There are many ways to approach the division of marital assets, and you and your spouse should ideally try to agree on a strategy you both feel is fair. Strategies to consider include: 

Some assets can be split into two equitable parts rather easily. For example, if you and your spouse share a savings account, it is simple for each of you to move a share of the funds into your own separate accounts once it has been established how the money should be divided. Other more complex assets are not so easy to divide. 

For some assets, like a stock portfolio, the difficulty in dividing the asset is in valuing it. For other assets, such as the marital home, the challenge is that the asset literally cannot be divided at all and another strategy must be used. Often, the challenge is that the spouses are unable to agree as to what type of split would be fair. 

An attorney can help you find the ideal strategy for dividing these complex assets. All marital property must be divided equitably in an Illinois divorce. 

Parents who are getting divorced must create a parenting plan. A parenting plan covers things like when the child will spend time with each parent and which parent has the right to make important decisions about the child’s upbringing. The most common co-parenting arrangement involves each parent having designated parenting time to spend with the child in their individual household. While this tends to work well for many if not most divorced parents, it is not the only option. 

Many parents hesitate to get divorced at all for fear that they will spend far less time with their children. There are several unique and creative strategies for parents who want a different way to co-parent after divorce. These strategies will tend to work best for parents who are able to remain amicable, as they require a higher degree of cooperation between parents. An attorney can help you assess which methods of post-divorce co-parenting are likely to be best for your family. 

Creative Co-Parenting Techniques for Divorced Parents

Not all methods will work well for all parents and children. It is important to carefully consider what is likely to work well in your individual circumstances. Potential co-parenting strategies you can agree to in your Illinois parenting plan include: